Last night I could not fall asleep. Jay and I went to bed at 11 p.m. I got in bed and was freezing. I got a heavy blanket. It didn’t work. I pulled up our heavy comforter. Still freezing. I tried to scoot closer to Jay to use his body heat but I didn’t want to wake him up since he worked a long day. So I moved to the sofa.
I took my pillow and blanket and got all curled up. Soon, I was sweating. I pushed off my blanket and turned on the TV. That didn’t make me sleepy. I was shaky and wiggly and I thought if I just took one pain pill it would help me sleep. But I’ve been trying to get off of them and hadn’t had one in 24 hours. Can you become and addict so quickly? I was paranoid that perhaps I was going through withdrawals or something. I’ve never been a drug addict so I don’t know what it’s like but no matter the cause of my insomnia, I stayed away from the pain meds.
So after TV, computer, reading (I’m reading a great book by the way called Trumpet by Jackie Kay that I’m going to write a post about), taking a hot bubble bath at 4 a.m., massaging my own legs, more TV, and praying to God to let me sleep, I fell asleep. It was around 5 a.m.
Maybe it’s because my schedule is all messed up. Whatever. I got up at 8 a.m. this morning so I wouldn’t sleep too long and hopefully I’ll get to sleep tonight.
Things I learned today: 1) I look pregnant 2) my handbag is heavier than I thought (it’s a Coach) 3) I should not be pushing a grocery cart around even though it might be empty and only have a package of Ziploc bags in it 4) there are hundreds of stitches inside me that will take longer to heal than the outside of my body 5) it’s as hot as the depths of hell here in Oklahoma right now 6) elastic waist pants are my new best friend.
3 Comments
July 31, 2008 at 10:22 pm
If you aren’t having pain but only want to sleep don’t take the pills.
I always keep my 7th grade algebra book nearby for when I can’t sleep. It puts me out just like it did in algebra class. Give it a try.
August 3, 2008 at 6:15 am
I have a different take on meds. Used for their prescribed purpose, I shy from none. I would advise to take the things.
I can tell from your writing that you are far too strong a person to let a habit develop.
September 26, 2008 at 7:55 pm
O M G
I found your blog somehow this evening….and I had the sense you were in OK…but kept reading and finally have confirmed it. wow.
I feel your pain. totally.
Email me when you get the chance…and if you’d like.
I’m in OK now as well. Goodness, sister.
love and grace,
pam