Sometimes it just hits me. The life I have now is not all that different than the life I had a year ago. But I have changed. Things have changed. Can others see that?
It has sunk in……..I married a gay man. But once in a while, I just can’t believe it.
Jay is a good husband, a good father, a great lover. He isn’t really gay.
Sometimes, honestly, I’m waiting for myself to wake up. God, that would be amazing. I’d cry and cry but I could breathe again.
7 Comments
October 24, 2008 at 6:02 pm
yep.
love ya girl.
i’m here.
pam
October 24, 2008 at 9:55 pm
come here, let me give you a hug
October 24, 2008 at 11:41 pm
You are strong. Never forget that……..
Kisses
XOXO
November 10, 2008 at 12:38 pm
Hey Luv, stay strong, there are people out here in the cosmos who think the world of ya
November 10, 2008 at 11:41 pm
I haven’t read a lot of your two blogs, just a few posts. Have the two of you had counselling separately and together? It seems to me that you are both mourning that things are not the way you both wanted them. But really, you are blessed to know the truth and where you stand with each other. It is an opportunity for you both to decide what you want for your futures separately, together, and what you want for your kids (and what the kids want also). I know you value your marriage, but perhaps there are other options you have not thought about. You cannot change the other but you can live your own dreams with the support of your spouse. Really think about what your individual hopes, dreams and goals are. Share them. Make them happen. There are new beginnings for each of you separately and a new phase to your friendship together. This situation really can be a blessing in disguise (a good disguise) if you allow it to be. I recommend some self-help and empowering books, courses and therapy. Be playful, remember what you wanted as a child and teenager, take up a new hobby. It’s your life. Be selfish, do what’s best for everyone (which is usually living your own truth) and make it beautiful.
November 27, 2008 at 7:09 am
Happy thanksgiving
December 19, 2008 at 10:19 am
Hi Anginae, I haven’t been around much lately. Long Story . I just wanted to wish you a merry Christmas and all the best for 2009. I hope you have been keeping ok and are doing well. Take care for now *hugs*